The entire experience has been fairly frustrating. If Sears didn’t have it in stock anywhere, then I don’t think I should have been able to buy it from them. And, even if I did, it should have taken four weeks for a refund to come through. I’m sure it would have been faster if I went through them instead of PayPal, but I honestly can’t see why it would take weeks to refund a purchase.

I also have a problem that Sears didn’t consider the cancellation emails if the product wasn’t in any store. It seemed like a pretty basic test case for any automated system.

I’m not the type of person who will refuse to buy from Sears again. Not my thing and I don’t bother remembering grudges. But, I’m glad it’s finally over and I can go back to enjoying my clock.

… which I love.

A week from Thursday, I’m heading up to WisCon for the weekend. This year, I decided to do some panels, but due to me not understanding the website, I didn’t get a single one I really wanted to do. Instead, I’m on three panels I’m interested in.

Build a World is an improv-style world development. It was fun to see how it turned out last time and I think I’m pretty good at creating worlds and plots on the fly, so I thought I would give it a shot.

The Glitch Memorial Panel is to talk about one of my favorite semi-social games, Glitch. It’s talking about the game in general and so I feel pretty comfortable.

The final panel, The Female Soldier in Science Fiction and Fantasy, scares me though. I haven’t really focused on stories about female soldiers but it is a topic that I’m interested in. In specific, I’m interested in the difference in portrayals of females in fantasy and science fiction in general.

I’ve been trying to do research on this panel so I don’t quite sound like an uneducated fool. This research is basically going through the novels and movies I have in my collection (plus about six more that I bought) and trying to get a general “feel” for how they are shown.

Though it is poorly written, I have thrown my initial notes up on a website SF/F Women. I’m trailing behind what I’ve read/watch verses what I’ve written up because it takes a lot of time and focus to try to analyze every female character.

There is a fear that what I’m doing is a waste of time, but I’ve found a bunch of new book series that I never read but enjoy, plus I think I have a better handle on both how military women are shown in these books and movies, plus how difficult it is to find military women in my collection. I have, um, a lot of DVDs and could only five 12 DVDs with examples.

So, that is why I’m not working on anything really creative. No stories or novels. It feels wrong and I’m getting anxious, but I really want to be able to speak for twenty minutes on any topic the other panelists and audience brings up.

One of, let’s call it quirks, of our marriage is my broad range of creative skills. It’s something that she loves, but I’ve never repeated a gift in thirteen years when it comes to our anniversary.

This year was probably one of the hardest to make. Years ago, I bought one of those “handmade” books of custom paper. It was a splurge purchase and it’s moved a couple times with us.

The day after last anniversary, I was looking at it and got an idea. I would write little “inspirational” sayings, poems, essays, and (poorly drawn) illustrations over the year to show how much I love her. It took me quite a while and somehow I was still trying to get those last twenty in Sunday night before I went to bed.

It ended up being 162 pages from end to end and 162 little ways of showing how much I love her.

It was a good year.

She loved it, but it will be hard to beat it next year.

Sears

I’m still struggling to get my money back from Sears. Apparently, they have never canceled an order before. I know that isn’t true, but I’m having a little bit of troubling believing that a company I grew up with could have this much trouble with PayPal and their own ordering process.

I bitched about it on Friday on Twitter. Yeah, it was petty, but it got answers. My “assigned executive contact” finally answered the messages I’ve been leaving for a week without an answer. “I was on vacation,” was the excuse. It wasn’t on her voicemail message, so all I got was no answer for days at a time. I think she was annoyed at me, but it has been two weeks and I’m actually getting annoyed.

Something else must have happened because I got an email that told me that I will be getting a refund in 3-5 days. Because, they can take my money in 30 seconds, but it still takes a week after I bitch enough to give it back to me.

SMWM was annoyed that they are refunding exactly what I spent on them instead of offering something for the (apparently five) weeks of trying to handle this order. I knew they wouldn’t, Sears is a big company and I assume they a) don’t care and b) assume I’m never going to do business with them again. I can’t answer that.

eBay Purchase #1

The broken alarm clock I got on eBay, on the other hand, went smoothly. I sent an email saying that a button didn’t work. They apologized and told me to send it back. Two days later, they got the package and refunded me for the entire price. They also refunded my costs to ship it back.

I didn’t get anything extra, but you know what? They were prompt, friendly, and responsive. I’m okay because they tried. I also gave them positive feedback because… well, they were nice.

eBay Purchase #2

Yeah, I bought the clock again from an eBay. This was a refurbish with free shipping. It showed up… also broken. But, they didn’t say it was “factory new” like the other one. And the ways it was broken (one burned out, non-essential LED and a missing lithium battery) were acceptable things. So, I accepted it, gave them positive feedback, and plugged it in.

I didn’t accept the first one because the Alarm 2 button wasn’t working. I can live with not knowing it’s Thursday, I don’t work well without a second alarm.

Amazon

Amazon is too easy, but I also don’t trust them. My guidelines are “local and small” because large companies (like Amazon and Sears) stop caring about people and start obsessing about only one thing: money. They don’t try to help because there is simply too much going on. This comes from Amazon’s “permanent decision” that occasionally pop up or Sears struggling to refund my money after weeks of trying.

I prefer local because it means taxes. Taxes pay for the road in front of my house, services around him, and the general quality of life. People who do business on eBay pay taxes and help their communities. Companies like Amazon and Sears make big deals with counties and states to avoid taxes which means they don’t help people. So, the “small and local” is to help more than just myself… though I have to pay more to get it.

The clock

Now, the biggest fear after all this drama is that the clock actually sucked. I was being picky about it because I knew what I wanted, though it was almost impossible to find. But, it is just about perfect. It isn’t too bright, the color is easy on the eyes, the alarm is perfect. It doesn’t do 24-hour, but that’s a minor thing. In the end, it was exactly what I was looking for.

Just wished it wasn’t so hard to get….

The babysitter one was actually the most frustrating one. Mainly because we’ve had three in almost three years. The first had a child, so it made sense why she stopped her home daycare. The second just flaked out but dragged it out for almost a month before SMWM finally “fired” her. This one… just stopped showing up. She didn’t answer any of SMWM’s phone calls, texts, or emails. No notice, no message, nothing. That is probably the most frustrating part of it is the completely stop.

I know that cutting off communication is easier for one person, but it is hard on the other. We spent weeks wondering what we did wrong? Did a check bounce (not likely)? Did they not like my books? My computer? The house? One of us? And, those questions will never be answered because they just… walked away.

The same thing happened to me in high school. A girl and her friends just stop talking to me. “You know why” was the only answer I got a year later. The problem is, I don’t know why. I still don’t know why over twenty years later. And, as much as I’m fairly good at letting things go, it bothers me that someone would just walk away without giving the courtesy of a reason or even to say they are going away.

The other dumping was my last commissioner. Since the economy tanked a few years ago, I lost most of the people who commissioned stories from me (well, ones that I felt comfortable writing). One was left and they gave me a new commission every 4-6 months which is nice.

I’ve been having some trouble with the last commission (not the commission, but everything going on in general), and I had to give them a second email saying I was going to be late (I hate being late). They told me that their life was changing and they probably won’t make another commission again. And to cancel the one I’ve been working on for a month.

That one hurt, but it made sense. Dropping $200-300 for a story commission is a major thing. And, with the economy, it is a luxury not a essential. I know that being late didn’t help, but it was also an excuse for them to change our relationship. It was painful, but they explained why and we talked. We ended on good terms and there was no screaming.

I don’t get upset when people need to change their relationship with me. I don’t scream or yell, but I know that other people do. The fear of rejection is a nasty one and some people stand up and explain why while others just slink away in the shadows. One reason I’m forward is because of that last one. Just walking away hurts people. It leaves them with doubt, confusion, and scrambling to recover. It does mean that occasionally, I’m rough or blunt, but I’d rather be forward and uncomfortable than hurt someone.

The light

This leads to my hatred of ultra-bright LEDs. In specific, the blue ones that every humidifier, fan, and recharging cable seems to think is the greatest thing in the world. And, “ultra bright light that will keep you up” isn’t listed on the side of the box, I don’t know that I’m going to have a blinding light until after I buy it and set it up.

My alarm clock is the worst offender of all, mainly because I can’t cover it with duct tape (my usual answer to bright lights) or bury it. By its nature, it needs to actually be visible to be useful.

The history

When we moved a year ago, we lost one box. Naturally, it contained my “good” clock which was a tolerable Emerson alarm clock with amber numbers and a decent dimmer. It also had the gradual buzzer (starts soft and gets louder), two alarms, and the 7-5-2 alarm modes (weekdays, weekend only, or all the time) for both alarms.

I have two other Emerson alarm clocks already. The green LED one is in the guest room and starts off with the mind-shattering loud sound. The blue one, which is the one I use, is so bright, I put it face down every night just so I can sleep. But, since both works (the green one sometimes fails which is why its in the guest room, it also doesn’t get below green laser intensity), I had no reason to replace it.

The excuse

At least until SMWM said she wanted a clock on her own side. She was tired of using her Android phone for an alarm (since that means it has to be in a known location and charged, something we both are bad at). After a brief negotiation (e.g., me begging), I got to look for a new alarm clock that doesn’t hurt my eyes as much and lets me sleep.

With all the excitement in the world, I got to go online and get a clock.

The first drama

I like Emerson clocks, mainly for the sound but their side and sturdiness. Sadly, Emerson doesn’t really make alarm clocks anymore and the one that is available is in soul-scarring blue. The amber version (CKS9051) is almost impossible to find.

I did find it at Sears and Amazon. When I was trying to decide on where to get it, SMWMW reminded me that my philosophy is “buy small, buy local”. I already canvased every store in the area to find any clock that was close, but couldn’t find anything. So, Sears qualifies as smaller than Amazon, so I went with them.

After a few minutes of trying to figure out what their Max program is (Sears’ version of Amazon Prime), I went with cheap delivery and paid by PayPal. And then sat down to wait for my clock to show up.

April 17 came around and nothing. Getting a little worried, I went online and found out that the order was canceled. Not by me, but by their system. Apparently, they sold something that wasn’t in stock in any store and their system doesn’t send cancellation notices if there is no stock. So, I got no email saying it was canceled, no notice that my money was refunded, or anything.

I bitched on Twitter and got the Sears adjective adjective Customer Care group person DM’ing me and then calling me. After going back and forth, they found out why I didn’t get an email, why it was canceled, and figured out where my money went. According to the, it takes 7-10 business days and a fax to PayPal to refund my money. Last I checked, I just click the “refund” button on PayPal, but apparently they need a “fax” from Sears. I also guess no one has ever had the system cancel their order ever since it took a day to figure this out.

I haven’t gotten my money back, but at least I know that Sears is not an option.

The second drama

I still could go with Amazon, but I decided to keep with my philosophy. After doing some searches, I ended up on eBay. There was only one “new” version of the clock, so I made an instant buy, paid for it and the $10 shipping, and waited another few days for it to show up.

I finally got to hold it in my hand. Plugging it in, it looked like exactly what I needed. Except… one of the buttons didn’t work. Apparently, “new” means smelling like smoke and not actually working. After going back and forth with the seller, I found out they plugged it in but never tested it beyond seeing the lights go on.

This afternoon, I sent it back in exchange for a full refund and them paying for the shipping. I’ll find out in a few days if they actually will do that, but it’s frustrating.

The never giving up

I decided to try again on eBay. The clock looked pretty good for what I saw of it in person and I think I want it. So, there are a few others selling that clock, so I’ll find out if there is going to be a third drama in a few weeks.

It’s hard to imagine that buying a clock would be such drama, but I know what I want and what I don’t want. And I suspect that much of the world is migrating toward smart phones or just keeping their clocks for 20+ years, so the market for good clocks is going down. I’ve noticed that for a while now, but the selection is growing thinner every year.

• Two alarms with 7-5-2
• Gradual crescendo for the buzzer
• Red (preferred) or amber, as dim as it will go

It seems like a small thing, but I also think this is important. A quality sleep is something that most people don’t get and I think it is because they don’t think about bright lights, background noise, or temperature. The problem with knowing what I want is that it makes it that much harder to get what I think I need (and I’m always willing to realize that it won’t quite work out).

The alternatives

I actually found an alternative which is to use the window tinting film and basically tint over the screen to make an existing clock dimmer. I could also build a clock, which sounds like fun but I have so many other project right now.

Sadly, the only clock I found that looked like the perfect clock, the Muse M-15 CR, but sadly it’s a Europe-only clock. But, it does 24-hour time. Oh well.

Noise

I commit a lot, mostly at the end of a thought. So, once I finish a chapter or a good scene, or write a series of methods and tests, I’ll commit locally. I don’t always give “good” messages for those commits, but enough to give me a hint of what is going on.

Checking in so I can move downstairs.

The problem with this is noise. There are a ton of check-ins that don’t have useful comments. After a day or three, I won’t care about those comments since they are basically just a progression to figure out something.

In the past, I usually worked on the master branch and cringed at the noise. Occasionally I would rebase to squash them down so I don’t have quite as much noise, but overall I just suffered with them.

Seeing it differently

With the migration to Git at work, I realized that I need to actually use branches more effectively. Noise commits aren’t so bad if they are put into a task branch and then later squashed once they get to the master root. So, I don’t have to worry about going downstairs if I know those will be collapsed into a single useful commit later.

It also lets me work without too many restrictions during the creative process. Which is good since I find committing frequently to be critical to my process.

Where to put it

Now, the really big question is where to put it. I’m normally not fond of airing my “dirty laundry” as it were. I figured no one cares if I’m switching computers during the process and I don’t blame them.

However, if I’m working between two machines, it seems silly to create an entirely different repository purely for the purpose of working between machines. This came up while working on the Fedran fonts.

At the moment, I decided to take a chance and just push it up to Github. There is going to be noise but it won’t be on the master branch. I might prefix the branches with “drem-” to indicate they are task branches.

This lets me take advantage of Github’s ability to manage branches but also to let other people join in (in the unlikely chance someone wants to help me work on something).

Novels

Since I also recently started my next novel (WisCon has a deadline for the writing group on the 15th), I decided to explore this process with the novel. I’m doing most of the work on the ‘sal’ branch because novel writing is pretty much independent of everything else I write. Same with the commissions and other WIPs (which I have a number of them).

Doing it this way means I can put novels in their proper place in my directory tree as a WIP instead of a dedicated folder. It’s a minor thing, but I like the Fedran stuff underneath the “moonfire/fedran/” directory instead of in the “wip/” folder.

Markdown

I’m planning on switching my entire writing repository over to Markdown within a few (mumble). I need to finish a little bit of programming, but I already have the Perl script to do the conversion. If I go with this approach, then I can easily create a “markdown” branch and do the conversion until everything is ready to migrate.

The biggest hangup on the Markdown conversion is a good conversion to DocBook. I have the beginning of one in my writing tools, I just haven’t finished it yet. It needs to be done so I can integrate the new code into my workflow.

New ideas hurt

I think the branching model will work out, though it feels strange. I just don’t know if the strangeness is because I’m not used to it or because it is wrong. I think I’ll have an answer in a few months.

Parametric Fonts

It wasn’t something I was going to really get into, but I got dragged into a number of discussions about MetaFont and MetaPost. I love the idea of MetaFont except that I haven’t found a good way of translating it OpenType fonts or TrueType fonts.

Side note: Getting the impression there are a lot of PascalCaseNames in software?

One of the neatest things about MetaFont is that it is parametric. You adjust a few dials and you get a different font. I can make a serif version of a sans-serif but keep the same x-height (much like Mrs. Eaves and Mr. Eaves). I could also have one with more of an italic bent. They will be similar (that’s the point), but visually different.

The biggest problem MetaFont is the inability to get it into TrueType. That includes getting good hinting and kerning set up so the font looks good in print in addition to being distinctive.

Somewhere deep in the vast repository of knowledge I have, I remembered that FontForge had a Python API and it could do almost everything I could do in person. FontForge also writes out OTF and TTF fonts. And, in a previous job of writing computerized sewing software, I actually created a system of creating sewing patterns based on detailed measurements along with a system of abstracting those metrics to make it easier to work with.

Another side note: Yes, I sew. I used to make dresses and costumes when I was a teenager.

FontForge

I’m fairly decent at FontForge. Well, not great but I’ve created three fonts already with it. Most of them were trivial (for a game I wrote) but I enjoy working with it. I also did the Miwāfu glyphs in it, but didn’t like the results so far.

Yesterday at lunch, I got the basics of a Python-based system for generating Fedran fonts. It is very rough at this point, but I think I’ll hit the first peak in a week or so. I’m making it text-based so it is easy to track how things change, but also so I can reuse aspects of the font for various glyphs (like serifs).

This is the fun part, when all the ideas are bubbling in my head. It helps distract from the serial, which I can’t work at lunch on and I can’t really get the time to focus during the week. So, I’m getting my writing in on the weekend. Still maintaining the 10-20k words/week, but just cramming it into three days.

Preview

Last night, I wrote up a quick Python-based program under the new umbrella of MfGames Font Python. This uses my tools framework, but basically generates a PDF of a Unicode range of an arbitrary font. Which is great when I want to see the results of my work. And since I use evince, which automatically reloads PDF files that change, I have a very fast development cycle of hitting F5 to build and seeing the result in 2-3 seconds.

There is a bunch that still needs to be done, but I think it is a good start to play around. I might not finish, but it is moving down the direction I want to go with both SAB and FOTS, but also longer-term plans.

Purpose

Speaking of SAB, this actually advances that project. In Fedran (the world Sand and Blood is set), there are a number of of languages including Volis, Miwāfu, and Lorban. In SAB, there is only one language, Miwāfu, but in Flight of the Scions there are all three plus telepathy. Most of them are notationally translated (e.g., you don’t have to know three made up languages to read my book), but I want a different visual appearance.

I could drop one of them, though I think it is nice flavor and leads into the next book. If I did that, it would be fairly easy to have two languages with one italic and telepathy which I use «guillemets» to distinguish it (thanks to So You Want to be A Wizard).

But, I want to see how this turns out. Even if it doesn’t, I’m having fun. I think it will look good, but it is something I won’t know until I typeset. I’ve had enough trouble finding a font that handles all of the Miwāfu accents well (áéíóúńàèìòùǹāēīōūn̄) and has a serif and sans-serif version. As long as I avoid the “n” accents (ńǹn̄), basic fonts work so I can still put it on Kindle and other readers.

Like most of my projects, I’m willing to set it aside if it doesn’t work. I have contingency plans for just about everything left in SAB. Since I have an editor scheduled for May, I figured I have a few months to just… play.

I already know SAB isn’t going to be for everyone. I don’t always write fluffy stuff and I went with a survival story closer to Lord of the Flies than Harry Potter. This was also focusing on a culture that is relatively intolerant of weakness (inspired by 300) and willing to risk death for even teenagers to determine who they really are. Yeah, they get magical powers out of it, but it isn’t… fluffy.

Later, I found from their spouse and from them, that they were afraid I would be upset with the response. They didn’t know how much I struggle for honesty, but even I wasn’t expecting to have such a thoughtful reasoning in the apologetic email. I usually don’t get any response when people give up. It just goes off into limbo and leaving me in doubt.

While I’m emotionally invested into SAB, I’m capable of separating myself from my work. I will never be upset about well-reasoned, honest feedback. I can’t be a writer for everyone, but knowing why people set it aside is utterly fantastic.

One person doesn’t like it? Might be an opinion. Two people don’t like it? Might want to look into it. Twelve say it’s wrong? Just fix it.

A good motto for writing, along with:

Just keep swimming.

Right now, SAB is with two more beta readers (one I honestly do expect to just stop reading) and I’m still working at fixing some bit-rot to get the print copies to two more (both friends or family).

Gadgets

My family loves gadgets. My dad and brother are both festooned with lovely little toys that blink and flash. Most of the time, one of them has the newest gadget to play with and spend hours showing off what it can do.

Every time I’ve tried, I used it for a week, maybe three, and then set it aside. This was the case for the Nokia n810, my Kindle Fire, my Palm Pilot, and even my Newton (loved the Newton though). I’m just not big on toys.

The longest I’ve ever used a gadget is the Kindle Fire. At the moment, I use it to check email and browse the web on the occasion when I’m not in the mood for firing up the laptop. Within five minutes, I’m done checking everything and I set it aside. I also use it to read books… that part I really like, but I go through a lot of books and I prefer EPUB over physical books in general.

In the end, my favorite gadget is a 6″ x 9″ graph pad. It has incredible battery life and I can do anything I want with it. Yeah, it isn’t bright and colorful, but it works for me.

Gozer the Destroyer

My Fire has a Gummi shell on it. I got it the day I got the Fire and for a good reason: EDM stuck it in the dog’s water dish within a day of me picking it up. Now, I occasionally find the Kindle smeared with oatmeal, yogurt, or oregano.

If I was borrowing the department’s Surface… well, I can’t really say it won’t die a horrible death in the toilet or the litter box.

Meetings

This is an interesting thing. I just came off a week of fairly critical, but long, meetings. One thing I noticed is that most of the attendees brought their laptops. When the meeting got slow, they started focusing on other aspects of their day-to-day jobs and not the meeting. When they had to pay attention, they had to drag their focus from the laptop to the phone or the questions given.

The same thing happens during the writing group. Occasionally, someone would bring their laptop and they would have the same thing. You’d have to poke them.

In the RPG games I ran, it was even worse. All but two of the players had laptops. When the plot didn’t directly relate to them, they would be playing games. Though, since most gamers seem to be an obsessive bunch, it took more effort to drag them away from one game to have them focus on the game in front of them.

I’m afraid I would have the same problem. I get lost in computer stuff and I have a really good focus with what I’m working on. If I have that distraction of bright shiny computers, I’d struggle to pay attention to the purpose of the meeting.

When I use to run RPG games, most of the players brought laptops. Inevitably, when I would switch the focus on one of those players, I’d have to poke them to get their attention.

Production verses Consumption

Tablets are great for consumption. I like reading my email, browsing Reddit, and checking websites. But, there are very few things I can create on a table. They are poor development studios (at this point) and I haven’t found a good text editor for novels. There are also relatively few tools for remoting into machines.

Most tablet also suffer for keyboards for me. I want a large keyboard on everything I use. Even my laptop’s keyboard is flawed when it comes to working the way I want it to work. I’m a touch-typer and when I have to work with a different keyboard, I lost a lot of speed and accuracy.

Large hunks of my life is centered around creating things. I feel guilty using my Fire already, working with the Surface is probably going to be the same thing. I want to create and I don’t quite get that.

Costs

In the end, I’d gave to give it up. Ideally, I would fall in love with it and want to buy one for myself. The problem int that aspect is that most of my spare money goes into SMWM’s photography business, EDM, and writing. Since I don’t enjoy gadgets that much, I end up not wanting to buy a new toy I’m going to not use.

Know thyself

A co-worker said I’m one of the “most self-described people they know.” I just don’t think a tablet is useful for me, mainly for my focus and because I won’t get the benefit that most people seem to get out of it.

I’m glad they asked and I appreciate being considered, but it is just as hard to say “no, thank you.”

Tallies

I went with a slight modified version of tallying votes. If someone said they liked a given title, I gave that line a +1. If they said they hated it, it got a -1. Some people just listed the one they liked, they got a +2. The reason I did this is because I knew I would get a limited number of opinions (ten in this case) and wanted a broad range.

• Becoming a Man: 3
• Sand and Blood: 5
• Shimusògo Run: 3
• Rites of Passage: 1
• Chasing Spirit: -1
• Chasing the Spirit: 4
• Becoming Shimusògo: -1

I apparently was confusing though, since the emails and writing group got the titles for the entire series (all three books are planned) and I apparently worded it wrong. But, I think I got most of confusion resolved.

Why I asked

I ask questions a lot when it comes to writing. Opinions of covers, series names, and titles of books. It seems like most authors don’t have the same problems I have and rarely do I see any other author requesting feedback for these things.

When I look at movie trailers and book covers, I realize they don’t appeal to me. I was ten when I realized I didn’t like pictures of people on book covers. But covers that had striking silhouettes or simple logos always drew my attention. I like illustrated covers over painted ones over photographs. Composition of images… ug, the color balance, brightness, and cropping always sticks out and ruins the moment for me.

I used to visit the art museums in Chicago quite a lot, but when someone would say “this is a beautiful work of art”, I only saw colors and paint, flat images that didn’t “move” like the guy standing next to me said they did. Same with most photographs.

So, I ask. With Casting Call, the cover I thought would be awesome was pretty much disliked by everyone I asked. Go figure, I thought it was cool, but I’m pretty happy with the results.

I have a doubt

I worry that my cover ideas won’t work. I love ink and watercolor illustrations and I think the three images I have planned would be pretty cool. Plus, I think that when I get the entire series done, it will tie in nicely. (Side note, I actually have to finish the series first.)

I do have a contingency plan, though, in case everyone says it sucks. I’m proud, but there is a point when I have to make a choice of personal view and ego. We’ll find out, I have a lot of work in the next six months.

The runner up

“Chasing the Spirit” was a very close runner up. The reason I didn’t pick it was because of the two other books I’m planning on writing. They just didn’t seem to work out for me as well as the “Sand and Blood” (which will have “Sand and…” as the prefix of the name).

Thank you

For the people who responded, thank you. I know I can be a neurotic mess when it comes to certain decisions, but I appreciate the help and encouragement.

In other news

I have a schedule with a recommended editor to look at “Sand and Blood” in May. And I have the money already saved up for it, so I getting excited about.

There are a few reasons that I’m just finishing a relatively old game. Three are the easier ones: I have a 26 month old in our house and he has a higher priority, I’ve been writing heavily this year and that takes a significant amount of my time, and I seriously don’t relax enough for my own health.

The last one is the hardest: I’ve gotten into a philosophical disconnect with my PlayStation 3 and Wii. This is the strange thing, but I just don’t want to play it because of the system (and company) itself instead of the individual games.

The Death of Consoles

Just this week, I read an article about how consoles are going to die. I don’t happen to believe it, mainly because people have been saying that since Super Nintendo. Consoles will be around for as long as people want things that Just Work™.

My reasons for drifting from console systems are probably not normal. As my coworkers mention (more than a few times), I don’t represent pretty much anyone besides myself. In this case, I’ve just thought about it for a long while before I realized I was already drifting away.

Rachet and Clank

Let’s start with the positive. I love this series. I’ve played it pretty much from the beginning and it has the right amount of humor, responsiveness, and enjoyability that makes it fun to play. The game is just fun. Now, it is created by Sony (see below), but I’m a strong believer that disliking one part of a company/group doesn’t mean you have to abandon the whole thing.

Final Fantasy XIII

I used to love this series, but the last few that I’ve played really haven’t excited me. In the case of 13, I was getting bored of the constant cut scenes. It felt like it was ten minutes of playing for an equal amount of cut scenes. Not to mention, I had no empathy for any of the characters. But I tried, I really did. I just ended up giving up on the entire game.

Removing Features

Many years ago, Sony came out with the PS3. I managed to get one from my mother for various reasons. I thought it was fantastic because they let Linux run on it and it played all of my PS1 and PS2 games (this is a first generation PS3). The second generation PS3 removed the hardware support for PS2 games and made it software. The third removed it entirely.

I got rid of my PS1 and PS2 (which still had fun games) because my PS3 could handle them. It was the only console that had backwards compatibility and it was amazing. It made me a convert despite the PlayStation being a lot more expensive than any other system (at the time).

Then, they removed the Linux option entirely. It was a neat option because it had potential. I didn’t use it to its full strength, mainly because Sony limited it pretty badly to start (couldn’t use the Blu-Ray drive), but I hated that they removed Linux entirely as part of a mandatory upgrade.

Having the removing those features broke that charm I had for the PlayStation. I can understand why Sony chose to remove it (reducing cost and encouraging you to get the PS3 versions of old games), but that doesn’t make the sting any less.

It is their choice, though.

Handling Hackers

A year or so ago, someone hacked the PS3 and figured out the master key. They were inspired by Sony’s removal of the Linux feature (from what I understand). Naturally, Sony went after them. Microsoft does the same with XBox hackers and Ninentdo goes after their hardware.

And that is perfectly fine for those companies.

But, I didn’t like that choice.

I’m a hacker. I like to mess with things and I really enjoy homebrew and indie games. I’m a bit of a script kiddie in this aspect, but I love following directions to side-load something. To see something that it a work of love that only thirty people would enjoy is a thrill. To get something working that doesn’t follow the normal path, that’s a joy. To have the comfort that I have an option besides a single store (re, Kindles and Amazon, i* and Apple, XBox and Microsoft) helps me fall in love.

There are games that will never show up in a game store now. For example, Sentinel Worlds 1 (one of my favorite games of all time) or the original Bard’s Tale.

Sony couldn’t allow that. If anything, to defend their regional sale (which I don’t care for). They felt the need to sue, just as Microsoft did verses its hackers. It is also why they have so much effort during the DMCA review sessions to perfect it from becoming an exception.

I don’t have to like it. Just as Sony is in the right to defend their property, I’m allowed to stop playing and tell people why. The money I spent on games is tiny and it won’t matter to Sony. I’d just rather spend it on Humble Bundle games and books.

Legal Agreements

I read user agreements. All 25 pages of Sony’s agreement that you must agree to every single time you do an update. It takes me about a half hour to read it and I’m still finding things I don’t remember reading the previous times. It is a painful experience, mainly because I’m not an expert at legalese. I only understand about 30% and I do this far more than anyone else.

It bothers me that it is so long. It frustrates me that they put in verbiage to prevent class action suits when the entire point of class action lawsuits is because they just did something to harm a large section of their users.

(Related note, I find it interesting that companies are now putting anti-class-action stuff in their documents but still create lawsuits with 100+ John Does.)

It is their right to require it, just as it is my right to say no.

Alternatives

I’ve been enjoying plenty of alternatives for my games. I play Glitch fairly inconsistently until it was shut down. I occasionally play Triple Town. I have just about every bundle there is and I enjoy a lot of those games. I buy from indie game developers. I feel more of a connection with those developers and it gets me more emotionally connect to them; I buy from them because of that.

I have high hopes for Ouya, but I’ll take that when it happens to (I am a kickerstarter for it though).

One of the key parts is that they don’t try to defend their product at all costs. Humble games don’t use DRM. I can walk away from Glitch without a problem, I just think it is cute.

None of those games require 20+ pages of legalese. Yeah, they aren’t as pretty as Final Fantasy or Ratchet and Clank, but at this point in my life, I’m okay with that.

The games, the games

I switched my desktop to Ubuntu a while later. The primary reason came from Steam announcing they supported Linux. Which, as my primary platform, got me excited.

Side note: I went a trifle overboard and bought about $50 worth of games since.

I love Linux, because it works the way I work. Or, I work the way it does. There are very few applications I need Windows for, mostly Visual Studio and games. Everything else, I switch over to Linux to do my work. The virtual desktops, the keyboard-centric programs, and even the look and feel just appeals to me more than Windows.

I won’t give up Visual Studio and ReSharper though.

Hesitations

I hesitated to upgrade my laptop. With the weekly serial, I have about an hours worth of posting to various private forums and mailing lists. Much of it is automated (because I automate everything), but the automation was based on the laptop’s environment. Blowing everything away meant I had to figure out how to get that environment up and running again.

There is something to be said about doing it though. I wrote down the tasks that I went through and I haven’t encountered too many missed items (mostly my custom code and some Python libraries). I did lose a password for an email account, which I never added to the password vault, so that has been done.

It is work reinstalling things. Ubuntu (well, Debian in general) makes it easy since I can just use apt-get to install the bulk of my needs (emacs24, kde-full, etc).

Out with the old

I get into patterns. Things I do every day. Before the flood in 2008, I used to play Kingdom of Loathing religiously. I even wrote a number of scripts to get through the tedious bit (more fun to write the scripts than to play the earlier quests). But, after three months of not playing, I sat to log in and realized I didn’t really care anymore.

Reinstalling an operating system is much the same thing. There were programs I used fairly heavily that I realized I didn’t really need. Firefox extensions I didn’t need, Chrome profiles, various libraries and development environments. It was all cruft that built up like plaque on my arteries.

The clean slate is a good thing on occasion. I usually try to wipe one machine once a year, simply to prevent too much of it dragging me down. Now, my Windows XP machine… I’m afraid to clean that (plus, it’s a 1.3 GHz machine and won’t run Windows 7 well). There are a lot of things that I can’t get back, including some games I didn’t get on Steam and I’ve lost the source files to reinstall. I suspect that machine will eventually become a VM and bit-rot, but at the moment, it is the only machine I won’t touch.

And in with the new

I like change… in certain cases. But, I’m also fairly loyal to programs. One of them, Thunderbird, has been my mainstay since it is cross-platform and supports GnuPG. But, it also crashes a lot in both Debian and Ubuntu. So, I switched to KMail and I’ve been pretty happy. I’ve tried other things, however, and they just don’t work for me. I like Tomboy too much to give it up yet (and no one has come up with anything close to OneNote on Linux; I also hate what Ubuntu has done to Tomboy).

With a clean slate, I think it is important to try new things. They don’t always work, but at least I’m not retreating to the things I know and missing out on the improvements that happened in the last 10, 5, or even 1 year.

I did the same thing with using my tablet. I like the touch interface for some things but hate it in other ways. But, I think the important part is that I tried to learn something new, even if I skipped out. The whole Python experience was a good example, I tried it for two years, wrote a good number of programs, and decided that I didn’t like it. Right now, TypeScript is going to be my exploration project for Author Intrusion, because I think it will do what I need it to do. If it doesn’t, I’ll switch gears again and find a different framework to work with.

Quirks

There are a few quirks on the laptop that took me a bit to figure out. It wouldn’t hibernate at first, but I finally tracked down the package I needed (powermanagement-interface) and it looks like I can hibernate again. This is important because I charge at home, and then hibernate so I can mess at work. I have about enough charge to make it through lunch before the battery dies. There aren’t any places to charge in the lunch room, so it limits my work there nicely.