Today is talk like a pirate day, which means I won't do it, but I want to write about it. I happen to like the day, its a fun silly holiday that doesn't really pretend to be anything but serious. And humor is sometimes what we need. And the occasional raunchy bit, like my favorite talk like a pirate song:

When laptops are benches God gave us fer wenches...

I was wandering around the first site and they had this little section of pickup lines for pirate day. Now, I have never used a pickup line... ever, but I do tease Fluffy when them on occasion. Though, mostly the hideous pickup line from the game Fable. But, reading through that, I realized they were missing a couple key categories of pickup lines, say gay, lesbian, and transgendered.

That doesn't mean I don't appreciate the others, but I like there to be at least a nod toward some of the other, less well-known pirates. Call it a similarity in life or just call it a twisted mind. So, here is my shot at pickup lines:

• That's it, take out your sword and prepare to duel.
• I wouldn't mind your loose cannon on my deck.
• I bet you have some cannon balls I could steal.
• I want to feel your broadside.
• Want to see how our swords measure up?
• On the seas, you enjoy every little thing you steal.
• You're everything a pirate needs: a hook to hang his hat on and a hole to bury his treasure.
• I might like Jack Daniels on shore, but I prefer my hard liquor down below.
• A trap is just a lock that hasn't been opened properly.
• A good pirate plunders everything.
• On the sea, you don't look a gift booty in the mouth.
• You have a chest I want to stick in mine.
• Only a pirate like you would dress up as a beauty.
• Lock me up, down below...
• Ye gods, you have a cannon in your treasures. A worthy prize indeed.
• With you, even if I have my sword sheathed, I'll still have one to fight with.

Yeah, some of them are lame, what do you expect? But, its a fun day. So have fun, enjoy yourself, and have a great pirate day!

Oh, and um, "aye" or is that "arr"?