I think I fired myself

Not from my job or anything. But, last night, I decided I was going to work on Scroll of the Lands since I really haven't touched it for a month or so. Instead, I wandered around my (rather tiny) apartment for an hour, putzing around instead of actually working on it. When I finally managed to sit...

... nothing.

An entire hour of nothing. I also realized that I've been having "nothing" problems on that project for a while now. So, after another hour of fretting, I decided to make a statement about it. In effect, saying I don't think I can give it justice until after my life settles down, I live with my wife again, and I hopefully only have a single house to worry about.

That, to say the least, is painful. I hate not finishing things, specially with so much interest in it, but after six months of really getting nothing done, should I continue to keep trying to get to it? I'm not playing Exalted, which makes it hard to write Exalted stuff. I'm not playing any role-playing games right now, which I feel makes it hard to write RPG material. And the hope to use it for becoming a White Wolf writer... well, I don't think I have the focus to do that justice.

I also don't have the drive to do it, which means I feel like I'm letting people down who got excited about this project. And, there is one thing I hate, and that is disappointing people.

There is also time. I have homework for class (1-2) nights and I'm spending 2-3 nights a week to visit the kitties. That leaves 2 days, I know, but when I pack stuff into those days, I start feeling like I'm burning myself out.

I might be waffling over this decision.

I hate this.

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